Oh, Mr. Dahmer, How We Wish You'd Opened Up the Box

“Oh, Mr. Dahmer, how we wish

    you'd opened up the box”

By Denise Noe

Oh, Mr. Dahmer, how we wish

you'd opened up the box

a young man needs privacy, 'tis true; 

still the world has come to rue

the day you didn't open up the box

we know you loved your son

a blonde cutie, that one

we've seen the family pics

Jeff comfy at the age of six

Oh, Mr. Dahmer, how we wish

you'd opened up the box

and seen that it wasn't porn

a vice your Jeff had outworn

no, not a stack of Blueboys

not even rubber sex toys.

Oh, Mr. Dahmer, how we wish

you'd opened up the box.

Jeff wasn't captain of the football team,

in school plays he did not beam;

he turned out something of a slob,

and the man couldn't keep a job,

but if that box you had uncovered

you would certainly have discovered

that tho he didn't make much bread,

the man had sure ‘nuff got a head.